Love Talk: Speak Each Other's Language Like You Never Have Before by Les & Leslie Parrott

Author:Les & Leslie Parrott [Les & Parrott, Leslie]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9780310245964
Amazon: 0310245966
Publisher: Zondervan
Published: 2004-09-27T22:00:00+00:00

Henry Ford

Empathy is what enables you to accurately view your partner’s talk style—to know why he or she is solving problems aggressively or passively, making decisions cautiously or spontaneously, and all the rest. Most important, empathy is your primary tool for tapping into your partner’s top emotional safety need. When you begin to recognize that your partner primarily fears losing loyalty or approval, for example, empathy catapults

you into a whole new stratosphere of compassion and understanding for him or her. Empathy, in other words, ushers in grace.

“Mutual empathy is the great unsung human gift,” says psychiatrist Jean Baker Miller. When a man and woman place themselves in each other’s shoes, intermingling both head and heart, they discover a depth of understanding others only dream about. Once-petty problems literally fall by the wayside as they tap into what really matters, deep down, to both of them.

The effect of mutual empathy in marriage and dating relationships is staggering. Research has shown, for example, that 90 percent of our misunderstandings would be resolved if we did nothing more than see that issue from our partner’s perspective. This is why empathy is the essence of Love Talk. Once you begin to practice this invaluable skill, on top of your insights about your combined talk styles, you will feel like two gold miners who have struck the mother lode. You won’t believe your good fortune.

It is only as we fully understand opinions and attitudes different from our own and the reasons for them that we better understand our own place in the scheme of things.

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